Verse 1
first off I'd like to introduce myself
name’s ****** and I love killing brain cells
just pass me a couple blunts and a brown bottle
and we'll get this party started full fucking throttle
always had a knack for making people laugh
to bad I won't make any money off that
cause I'm the polar opposite of living phat
I can barely afford to wipe my ass
drowning in bullshit I need to catch my breath
life’s a bitch and I’m gonna fuck her to death
I got a serious peter pan complex
and the last thing I practice is safe sex
living a sheltered life I’ve never been overseas
no confidence and full of insecurities
family always giving me the third degree
cause I graduated and I don’t know what to be

Chorus 2x
Who the fuck is big burn? what's he about?
he’s so superficial when he opens his mouth
well on this track ima spill the beans and rice
and give you an inside look at my life

Verse 2
hey what's up chicky chicky chick chick
bet the last thing your gonna do is suck this dick
see I’ve never had any fucking luck with the ladies
and these failed relationships are driving me crazy
now you know my heart has been shattered more than once
courteous of a couple dirty noxious cunts
throw a backstabbing ex best friend in the mix
and ya got some sincere Shakespearean shit
It's always in the back of my fucking mind
now my world's filtered through these jaded eyes
a truly forlorn individual but at least I look like Malcolm McDowell
trust me as far as this song fucking goes
I'm not trying to elicit any pathos
I just needed some lyrical catharsis
after this I’m back on being the hardest

Chorus 2x

Verse 3
sucking dick at life is what I fucking do best
and laying steaming hot carls on my own chest
self deprecating humor is the only way I get by
now just listen and you’ll find out why
everyday a little bit I'm dying inside
entrenched in this bullshit nine to five
I'll forever be resigned to the grind
just sitting and watching the parade go by
potential is a terrible thing to waste
a by-product of always playing it safe
like wanting to prove to daddy that I'm not a fool
but I got degree at a bullshit school
and why should you give a fuck about my plight?
another piece of shit in the bowels of life
and since we just rot in the ground when we die
consider this song my fucking goodbye
Chorus 2x